Happy 17th, Boy!!

What a Night!

Sunday, December 30 was supposed to be movie night. No one else from school was going, so I thought I'd be nice and hang out with Bubbles at her house. Since few people were going to show up, she made a change in plans. One of her other friends is recently married to an enlisted man, and they are moving to another state in two days. Okay, not a big deal to go out to a bar and have a few drinks. Until her friend Bricks decides she wants to go to DiveBar. So we get to the bar. Yay! Dollar drafts! Some guy starts hitting on Bricks and we all score free shots. Male Bartender gives us another free shot.

Two shots too many for me at one time. When I am drinking in public, I like to keep it toned down so that I can keep my wits about me. I like to keep the binges at home, where I know I am safe. I ordered fries and one more drink after an hour or so. I had stopped drinking at midnight. Bubbles kept going. Bubbles and her friends have this thing where they slap each other's tits. Bubbles decides she needs to slap mine. BAD idea because I didnt know the "rules" of the tit-slapping thing and punched her tits. HARD.

Bricks decided that she wanted to leave, and it's always best to follow this guideline - Arrive as a group, leave as a group. Considering that the Newlyweds are moving away, Bubbles wanted to stay. She also tried to convince Bricks to take me home. Bricks wants no part of it. And that's understandable, since she doesnt know me from a serial killer.

They go outside to smoke, and Bubbles calls me, screaming frantically. It sounded like she said they left. Since I can't hear what she's saying, I go outside. I see her in the parking lot, and she tells me that Bricks tried to drive away with her hanging half out of the car. Bubbles is very upset by all of this and keeps apologizing for Bricks. Saying things like "She's like my sister, what a stupid bitch", "I can't believe she did this", etc... She was so upset that she almost started crying. Then Bricks started blowin' up Bubbles' phone with texts, saying shit like "She's your friend, so she's your problem". It's one thing to feel uncomfortable about taking a stranger home, but one has to draw the line at acting like a cunt because you are a closet lesbian that wont admit it and get jealous when the girl you want wont leave with you. Bubbles finally convinces the Newlyweds to give us a ride, which is truly appreciated. Which also means that we have to wait until they are ready to leave.

At least there was a bit of entertainment during the 2 1/2 hour wait. A fight broke out, and one bouncer dude wound up pushing a woman into the bar. It looked to me like she hit her head on the bar, then slid down and hit her head on the foot rail. The men were dragged outside, and the female bartender got the woman to sit up. She was holding the right side of her head and her forehead. I think she might have broken her nose. She was taken away on a stretcher, while the Newlyweds were mocking her "She's not bleeding! She's faking it!"

Time to go yet? YES!! Bubbles asks me for gas money. Fair enough. Little did I know that Newlyweds only had planned to take me as far as Bubbles' house. They did give the money back, which is good because I took a cab the rest of the way but not before it was time for Bubbles to pray to the porcelain goddess.

Mute Monday - Winter

Friday Feast 173

Appetizer
Name 2 things you would like to accomplish in 2008.

Get organized and eat healthier

Soup
With which cartoon character do you share personality traits?
Yosemite Sam, cuz I'm the rootinest tootinest gun-slingenest orneriest cowgirl this side of the Pecos.

Salad
What time of day (or night) were you born?
6:24 AM

Main Course
Tell us something special about your hometown.
Even though our sports teams haven't won any Big Events, our fans are always loyal, and energetic and still love the teams.

Dessert
If you could receive a letter from anyone in the world, who would you want to get one from?
Eddie Izzard. But only if he's covered in bees.

Good Times

This week started out with thoughts of how the days were going to be spent between families, the actual holiday, and work. Here is what the week is supposed to look:

Sunday - grocery shopping, last minute Christmas shopping, laundry and house cleaning.
Monday - more last minute shopping, going to M's aunt's house for lunch, and then to my aunt's house for dinner.
Tuesday - make a big breakfast to torture the ungrateful children, unwrap the gifts (some of which will be wrapped while seriously buzzed or drunk), more house cleaning, trying to pry the children from their various gifts (or normal teenage Klingon cloaking behavior), turkey dinner and movies
Wednesday - go to work, organize my various repository areas of crafty items, clean the mess that I made while cleaning.
Thursday - go to MILs house, hope that no one gets into a fight, have dinner and come home
Friday - go to work, organize my various repository areas of crafty items, clean the mess that I made while cleaning.
Saturday - go to work, organize my various repository areas of crafty items, clean the mess that I made while cleaning.

I'm tired from typing all that...

This turned out to be the best Christmas Eve ever. I got to spend the evening with my mother's family. Something that I haven't been able to do since I was too small do anything more than think that I vaguely remember Christmas Eve at my Gramma's. I have pictures of Christmas past at Gramma's, but cannot actually remember being there. More on that later. Gramma, aunts and uncles, cousins, tons of kids - from teenagers to babies; all running around waiting for Santa. Good food, drinks, laughter, and family.

That's what it's all about. So here's to my readers - May you have a joyous holiday filled with love, laughter, and peace. I'm off to enjoy my sugarplum memories.

Merry Christmas

Santa's new reindeer

TMI Tuesday #115

1. What is your favorite holiday memory from when you were a kid?
That would the year I got my Raggedy Ann, which I still have. She is homemade, and is about 3 feet tall.

2. What is the "naughtiest" thing you have ever done under a Christmas tree?
The only really naughty thing i can think of is not properly watering the poor tree.

3. On a scale of 1-10, how "good" were you this year?
Well, considering things that I've done, I'd give myself a 3.

4. How long have you been playing TMI? Regularly?
I've been playing pretty regularly. Although, I've been posting after Tuesdays lately.

5. What is the most embarrassing thing that happened to you this year?
I got fired for a stupid reason.

Bonus (as in optional):
Tell us a secret from your past that you would share during a "Nobody in this room knows this about me" ice-breaker.
I really hate "ice-breakers". The only ones I can think of for this category are ones that are shoved way back into the skeleton closet.

A Blessed and Merry Yule

The Nose Knows

While I am quite proud of being a non-smoker for almost 4 years, I cannot stand one fringe benefit - I can smell EVERYTHING.

Some things that smell great:
Freshly bathed babies
Baking christmas cookies.
The air after a spring rain.
Fresh cut grass.
My beautiful Wife's hair.
My beautiful Mistress' hair.

Some things that don't smell great:
Cigarette smoke (even though I used to smoke). I can actually tell if the person smokes cheap nasty cigs or the name brand.

Weed. I can't stand that other students at my school have to stink up the whole entire room because they feel the need to smoke. I dont care if they smoke, I just dont wanna smell it.

My son's room.
My daughter's room

Garbage

Greasy food

Sometimes, if I smell something really bad I have to go in search of the source. The fam will often find me sniffing around the house, in search of a smell that apparently only I can smell.

TMI Tuesday #114

1. Are you done with your shopping yet?
Not quite. I have to take the Boy out to get gifts for Baby Girl and M.

2. What is your favorite sexual position?
all of them. LOL

3. On a scale of 1-10, how open are you to trying new sexual things?
I'll say 7. Just don't involve animals or children.

4. What present are you hoping to get this year?
Other than the Indiana Jones Box set, I've given up on asking for specific items for Christmas. I'd be happy if one of the monsters cleaned their room, or if someone made a homemade gift for me.

5. With your current partner (or your last partner) how often was the sex better than just good?
I'd say 7 times out of 10 the sex is better than good. It's just less often now. :(

Bonus (as in optional):
Can a relationship that you are part of survive on sex alone? Could it survive a prolonged period of abstinence?
I don't believe that any relationship can be called such on sex alone. I'd call it fuck-buddies. A relationship can survive a prolonged period of abstinence. I have proof. I'm in one of those relationships right now. Scheduling, privacy in the house, holidays, hell - just plain life gets in the way.

I gotta fix that!!

Mute Monday - Role Models

My beautiful wife

My beautiful MistressMs Jade

Single Mothers

TMI Tuesday #113

1. Are you an early shopper or a late shopper?
Definitely a late shopper. I'll probably be late to my own funeral...

2. What is your favorite cartoon (current or passed)?
Bugs Bunny - particularly the episode with the little native guy.

3. On a scale of 1-10, how competent are you on home repair projects?
depends on the project. I try not to get involved too much, but I guess I would give myself a 6.

4. What is your favorite holiday tradition?
Making christmas cookies and eggnog.

5. Describe your favorite kiss? Do you give it or receive it?
Butterfly kisses are my favorite. I like giving and receiving.

Bonus (as in optional):
What is the best holiday gift you have ever gotten? Best you've given?
The best holiday gift I've gotten and given was late. My son was born on New Years Eve.

Mute Monday - Submission

Friday Feast 171

Appetizer
What was the last game you purchased?

God of War

Soup

Name something in which you don’t believe.

This is a tough one. I believe in lots of things, I think I'll come back to this one.

Salad

If you could choose a celebrity to be your boss, who would you pick?

George Clooney. And not because I think he's good looking (which he really isnt), but because he buys his assistants really cool stuff.

Main Course

What was a lesson you had to learn the hard way?

The right way to evict a tenant.

Dessert

Describe your idea of the perfect relaxation room.
No kids.
No laundry.
Johnny Depp
Lots of candles
Some big comfy chairs and couches
Lots of pillows
A few blankets
Some nice relaxing music
A big plate of cheeses, crackers and fruits
Some wine
Tons of books to read (for when I'm not screwing Johnny's brains out)

Who's that Kiki?

I finally got myself a profile pic.

TMI Tuesday #112

1. If your partner buys you a sexy little "something" is it a present for you or for your partner?
It's for both of us. I LOVE getting sexy little somethings!!

2. What are 3 characteristics of "your type"?
A good sense of humor.
Italian.
Dimples.

3. On a scale of 1-10, how good a cook are you?
I give myself an 8.

4. Tattoos: Love them or hate them. On you? On a partner?
LOVE them. I want one. I want M to have one.

5. Stubble: Good or bad? How often do you shave?
Stubble is bad! YUCK! No one wants rug burn. Anywhere.

Bonus (as in optional):
What are a few of your favorite things (both sexual non-sexual)?
Sexually, I really like it a bit rough. Hair pulling, spanking, and biting
Non Sexually, I really love trying new sweets. LOVE ice cream!!

Sloganized!

No Kiki, No Comment.

Enter a word for your own slogan:

Generated by the Advertising Slogan Generator, for all your slogan needs.
Get a slogan!!

Mute Monday - Colors

I'd Like to Buy the World a Roy G Biv.

Enter a word for your own slogan:

Generated by the Advertising Slogan Generator, for all your slogan needs.
Get a slogan!!

Water water everywhere

and not a drop to drink!!

One can never truly appreciate how precious water is until it is taken away. The simple joy of taking a shower. Washing dishes or clothes. Or even draining the pasta water. It all goes into my basement because my sewer line is still broken. I am trying to find a way to pay for someone to come fix it. Sorry, but I just don't have $2300 laying around, or falling out of my pockets.

Friday Feast 170

Appetizer
What is your favorite carnival/amusement park ride?
Roller Coasters!!!

Soup
How do you react in uncomfortable social situations?
I usually make it worse by saying something totally inappropriate because I don't always have a lot of tact.

Salad
On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being highest, how much do you enjoy discussing deep, philosophical topics?
I'd give it a 7. I don't mind a deep, philosophical discussion with a person that isn't just talking to hear himself speak.

Main Course
Did you get a flu shot this year? If not, do you plan to?
No flu shot for me. They are part of the government conspiracy to track citizens. :)

Dessert
Approximately how many hours per week do you spend watching television?
At least 3. I watch NCIS, House, and CSI (Vegas). I'm not usually home to watch them, so I tape them and watch them on weekends.

Got Strays?

It's been a while since I actually typed something other than my usual TMI answers or other memes (which I've neglected ). So howzabout an update?

Remember when I got fired? Well, I got a new job in a call center! A lot less stress for me, and I can wear pretty much whatever I want. I can surf all day between calls. YAY!

My father got fired from his temp job because he dropped the F bomb. BOO!!!

My son had a "girlfriend". She lives in Canada. Not too good for the phone bills or the relationship. He went to her house for dinner, then a few weeks after he went to a semi-formal dance at her school. He broke up with her the next day. I told him not to do it like that. A break up should always be done in person. Not over a phone call, or even worse - a text message. Bad juju.

Boy has a friend who will be staying with us. His mother kicked him out, and he can't stay with his father. It's winter and I'm not gonna let anyone be forced to stay out on the streets. That's why my father is still staying at my very small house.

Oh, yeah. Almost forgot - my sewer line collapsed. So now we have to dig up the yard to replace the lines - that's if we can find them. We don't have any schematics showing where they are located on the property.

Dollie is having a girls night on Saturday. I can't wait!!

TMI Tuesday #111

1. Are you a member of the mile high club?
No, but I wish I could be a member.

2. What is the most public place you have ever had sex?
My backyard.

3. What is your most embarrassing family moment?
It was a hot summer, and I was pregnant with my son. M and his family were running around with squirt guns, when he ran out of water. He said "Time out! I'm shooting blanks!" Everyone stopped where they were and looked at me... it was obvious that he wasn't shooting blanks.

4. What kind of birth control do you use?
Lately it's been abstinence. Otherwise I have an IUD.

5. Have you ever had sex in the snow? Rain?
It's usually too cold to have sex in the snow, but I'd give it a try. Never did it out in the rain.

Bonus (as in optional):
Describe your flirting technique: innuendo, telling a dirty joke, talking about sex life, or physical contact?
It depends on the situation. Because I am married, I usually flirt by innuendo. If I know the person well enough, I will tell dirty jokes.

Mute Monday - Rebels WARNING**** NSFW