Cosmic Oddities

This past weekend, I went to my friend Bubbles' house for a Tarot card "party". The price was $5 per reading, and the proceeds went to Hospice. Even though I really don't take stock in such things, I figured what the hell since the money goes to a good cause.

I've had my cards read before, but by Rockabilly Red. She already knows everything about me, so that's sort of like cheating. Even though the reader gave a "this is for entertainment purposes only" disclaimer, he hit all the nails right on the head. The conflicts between me, my DNA sponsor and my son; how I'm just hanging around, not doing much with two degrees; even my feelings of wanting to run away from it all. Scary!

I've been feeling indifferent the past few days. The kids and DNA Sponsor fight over watching TV a lot. I tried to make a schedule, so that everyone gets a fair shot at watching recordings and shows. It's guerrilla warfare in TV land. Someone keeps deleting recordings, or skips recordings. It's getting tiresome. So far, it hasn't worked out too well. I've only told the Boy, since he is the only one at home during the day because his lazy ass doesn't have a job. I told him to pick either Monday or Thursday to watch his recordings. I picked Wednesday, since it's my day off.

It didn't work that way. The first thing Lazy Boy did was turn on the idiot box to watch his shows. I told him it wasn't his day to watch. "But it's in the morning". FINE.

Sometimes, I revert to saying things are fine when they aren't. I just spent the whole day in my room, only coming out to get laundry done. Let the little fucker watch the damn thing. I don't care anymore. I'm tired of dealing with all this shit. I'm tired of being expected to raise the spirits of everyone else in the house, when I can't even get my own spirits up. The kids have been treating me like shit, and I think it's because I don't have the balls to tell DNA that he needs to get the fuck out of the house. He was only supposed to be there for a few months, while he "got back on his feet". That was 4 years ago.

I'm tired of the snide comments from the kids and M about DNA. I'm tired of DNA being at my house. I'm tired of trying to keep things smooth. I'm tired of the kids and the way they treat me. I'm just tired of everything.

That is all.